2-fer

And catching-up from several months of not blogging:

Air Force:
Nope… not gonna happen for me. Am I sad? A little. Am I glad? A little bit more glad than I am sad. I’m not so sure I am cut out to be IN the military. Oh, I could do it. I just don’t want to. I’m spoiled and lazy; and I know this. I know this now more than ever since I couldn’t even lose 10 stinkin’ pounds to make my “goal” weight. Humiliating... but I’m not bitter. I know this wasn’t for me because if it was, I would have chosen it long ago, or I would not have had to jump through my self-imposed fiery hoops to make some lousy weight-loss goal—I would have already BEEN thin enough. Plus, everything happens for a reason (one of my favorite life-mantras); and this didn’t happen for a reason.

Kid’s say the darndest:
My Hubby (singing): “I’m-a-be- I’m-a-be- I’m-a-be”
Our child (singing): “I’m-a-be-bumble-bee-I’m-a-be-bumble-bee”

School:
My kid’s birthday is the last day of the school year cut off: 8/31. Here children have to be 5 before 9/1 to start school. My kid barely made it. We thought about letting our little sponge-of-knowledge sit out the first year. But, back in April we received a letter from the daycare saying the whining was too much and we had 2 weeks to find another sitter. In a scramble we found one that is conveniently located between mine and my husband’s office. Although this daycare is more convenient, there are 16x more kids the same age as our child. So, we thought we would try school this year… School starts 8/12.

Weight-loss:
Well, this is more about NOT being a vegetarian. I guess this is just one more thing I will not be doing this year. I still want to. I KNOW it is tons more healthy for me and I would probably lose weight if I stopped eating beef… well, meat, in general. I’m not good a cooking beans. Everything I try… fails. Miserably. I want to learn how to can/jar fruits and veggies. In my mind, that goes along with being vegetarian—it’s just the next logical step. I’m completely open for someone to help me get started… like send me links to sites that articulate clearly in a step by step way to slowly remove meats and slow add other protein sources. My husband won’t eat a lot of soy meats… so, what else can I do, besides beans?

Ok… enough rambling. It’s time to go soothe my killer sore throat.

Sheesh… it REALLY hurts. :(

Sadness

So far this month has been filled with ups and downs...

My friend’s sister-in-law gave birth to a little boy was born with a defect in one of his heart valves, after two open heart surgeries, he is finally home with his family. Another surgery is to follow in about 5-6 months.

The musician at my wedding passed away. He had been sick for a while, so it was reassuring in that he was not taken from his family too soon. He was an elder--in his 80's. He lived a long, love filled life with 7 beautiful, talented and prosperous children, each with children of their own. My only regret is I didn't keep in touch with him like I should have.

My husband celebrated his 35th birthday in the manner in which most single men might like to enjoy it... at Hooter's wearing balloon boobs, of course. ::shrug:: I don't understand it, but the pictures I saw where actually quite hilarious and very demeaning toward women. Hopefully a future employer won't find these. Our two-year old was not up for a night on the town; therefore, I played babysitter while daddy enjoyed his boobs... I mean, booze. :\

Yes, he is still unemployed. The Monday after Thanksgiving will be exactly one year since he had a real, full-time job. He has had jobs that paid, some even paid well, but none were permanent. This month he has been on two interviews. That is very exciting—then I heard on the news there are at least 8 people applying for every position available. I just hope someone picks my husband.

The Air Force is looking less and less like a possibility. Since April I have lost 30 pounds, but I seem to have hit a plateau. I have held firm at goal weight + 10. Those last 10 pounds need to come off. I have changed my entire routine to accommodate exercise and diets. I guess I will either have to wait until June to apply or give up the attempt.

We are supposed to be going to my grandparents this Thanksgiving. I am very much looking forward to it but there are no funds for gas. I am hoping my mother’s “new to her” minivan will have enough room for us, them and all out belongings. I sent out an extraordinarily long e-mail to everyone scheduled to ride with together: mom and dad; me, hubby and the kid; sister and her live in boyfriend. I was terribly long. My mother claimed 30-minutes were spent reading my email. I offered a prize to the first person to respond to that email—just to see who would actually read it and follow the instructions—I thought my mother would be the only one. And she was. My sister and her boyfriend never even mentioned the email and my dad claimed to have simply skimmed it. Where is the love?? Lol… it was all in fun. But, my mother will get a prize—prize to be determined.

Ok, that’s all for now. Just in case… Happy Thanksgiving. J

Delayed Reaction

Ok, so I have gotten myself a bit overwhelmed with various obligations.

Bridal formal yesterday prooved to be a huge success with 22 images selected, that's several days worth of editing.

Her wedding is October 3, so I have to have the formal completed several days before her wedding.

I am scheduled to take the AFOQT October 12. My study time has been severely compromised because of the previous obligations. Therefore, I am going to rescheduled the AFOQT for the first week of December.

That should give me plenty of time to edit wedding images and then prepare for the test.

Still hittin' the gym/park 6 days a week.
Still need to lose 10+ pounds...

Suggestions?

too little too late

I have too much to say and not enough hours in the day.

Worked 40-ish hours at my day job
Spent 12 hours at the gym this week
Worked 10-ish hours at my contract photo job
Nursed a sick child
Lost 4 pounds

All in all it's been an ok week.
I still have 10+ pounds to lose.

Must.

Have.

Sleep.....

Service to country

Met with the AF recruiter today. Incredibly nice guy. My husband was in attendance and made lots of uplifting banter. Not that any was needed, it's just his way.

I am really feeling more confident about my decision to pursue the Air Force as my future career path. I watched the video of OTS we picked up at the recruiters office. Definitely brought home the reality of my path.

Feel free to comment.

If you are so inclined, please visit my blog friend, Niobe, her sister was involved in an automobile accident. It doesn't look good. Visit her blog and leave supportive comments.

Sitting, waiting, wishing...

That is probably one of my favorite songs. Jack Johnson, in case you're wondering. The video is awesome, too. It's filmed in reverse. Here's a link to the video on you tube.

This title is an accurate depiction of how I feel at this very moment.

I am sitting here. Obviously.

But more importantly, I am theoretically sitting here, too. Sitting in life. Stalled out. No opportunity for opportunities to advance my careers--my health insurance day job nor my photographic moonlight job. Zero chance of being able to sell my house (if I wanted to) and not actually lose money. My husband is still unemployed. So, here I sit. Waiting.

Waiting for what? Well, several things, actually. The most exciting thing is my child's birthday party. It is scheduled for tomorrow at a local park. I have lots of family in town that we haven't seen since May.

The next most exciting thing is... well, the Air Force. Now I know you're probably sitting there, scratching your head and wondering WTH and where did that come from? Well, it came from many months of thinking about what *I* could do to change my current "seated" position. So I have decided to apply for Officer's Training School (OTS) to be an Officer in the United States Air Force.

Since my husband has been unemployed for so long, I have become a very pro-active individual. This is not to say I have just started being pro-active. oh, no. I have always been such; however, now, it's manifested itself into serious crunch time. Get it done or get out, kind of change.

Here is how I look at my situation:
I grew up an Army brat. Hindsight is 20/20. Looking back at my life as a teenager living in Germany, I realize those are some of THE most awesome days of my life. I would never change that opportunity because is sculpted the person I have become today.

My husband could certainly benefit from the discipline of the military; however, he does not have a degree and he is 35. The Air Force requires commissioned officers be commissioned prior to their 35th birthday and have at least a Bachelor's degree. So, if he were to join as an enlisted (E-1) his base pay would be slightly less that $17000.00 a year. Frankly, that is not enough for us to survive off of, much less be able to live. Ok, fine... He would also get housing allowance, and other benefits; such as: free health insurance for all of us, free trips all over the world, etc. However... and here's the drawback... I would have to quit my job. Granted, that is what I am considering anyway (aside from the Air Force); however, I would be forced to quit a good paying job for possibly nothing. With the national unemployment numbers as they are, I would be absolutely stupid to do that considering I'd have a great chance of not finding a job with the pay I am currently earning.

This bring me to my next point(s):
I have a degree and I am less than 35. My husband is already unemployed, so there would be no job for him to quit. As an O-1, I would be earning nearly double what he would as an E-1. Additionally, O-1 salary is about $2000/annually more than I currently earn, add on to that the housing allowance, dependent pay, etc... and I could be making nearly $60k a year (depending on the location we get stationed). That's my salary and my husband's (required salary) combined.

Yes. I know there are draw backs...remember, I grew up as an Army brat. We were station in Germany when the wall fell and when the first gulf war started. My father was never deployed, thankfully, but he could have been, easily. And it's something we had to deal with, daily. I know being in the Air Force (or any branch of the military) means I will have to spend a great deal of time away from my family. I do not like that part at all. However, being deployed for a job that is helping to support my family vs one that has rejected me for promotions time and time again seems like a better solution than staying in a dead end job longer than necessary.

And this brings me to the wishing part of my life. The only thing that is standing in my way of getting selected for a slot at OTS is my weight. Granted I am in relatively good health--someone might look at me and say, "Oh, she could lose a few pounds, but she's not fat." Well, the AF has a weight limit. And I need to lose 15 pounds, legally and morally, QUICK. I've hit the gym everyday (except Sundays) for the past 2 weeks. I have not changed the way I eat--2 veggies, 2 fruits, 3 proteins, low carb/fat; therefore, with all the running and weight training, you would think I would have lost 10 pounds already. Yes, I know muscles weighs more than fat; however, I walk/run 6 miles a week and I do light weights with lots of reps. I'm wishing this weight would come off quicker. So, WTH?

I doubt very seriously I will change my mind. The Air Force might decide for me; however, I won't change my mind. I will work my behind off at the gym, cut carbs, cut fats, etc... to lose this weight.

In addition to the CFE I am supposed to be studying for in my current day job, add to it now the AFOQT, Air Force Officer's Qualification Test.

Don't wish me luck... I need a miracle.